I’m joining commentary coverage late, as it’s 6:27pm. I’m currently waging a war on my own apartment, but that’s a story for later.
Let’s just get this over with. I hope the next four hours fly, because I’m ready for this pathetic excuse for a political convention to be over.
Okay, PBS, let’s get to actual convention coverage instead of fawning over the president and Democrats in pre-taped segments. Par for the course, I realize, but I’m bored with this attempt at balance. Though, Mary J. Blige’s set wasn’t sounding so great while you were carrying that, and the race-baiting “reverend” that was speaking before her, I could have done without. Until they have a real guest in the box or start carrying a speech on the floor, I’m checking out.
One little note, though. Am I surprised that the spin machine is really downplaying this move from stadium to arena? For the uninformed – which doesn’t really include my audience – President Obama was supposed to deliver his acceptance speech at the Carolina Panthers’ Stadium – or as everyone else knows it as, the Bank of America Stadium. It was a combination of bad marketing on the part of that name and the fact that the enthusiasm gap between 2008 and 2012 couldn’t be much greater that facilitated the move. They’ll blame it on the weather, but it’s bad publicity that’s the real culprit.
Another little note, because I’m still bored with the PBS coverage/propaganda. Yesterday, the convention “voted” to include “God” and “Jerusalem” in the platform. The nays were very vocal. That’s very telling about this party. What’s even more telling is that they had to hold a second vote to recognize God and Jerusalem in the first place. This party is obviously hostile to those of the Christian and Jewish faiths. Which begs the question: why in the world would Jews continually vote for Democrats. With all the hostility toward the Catholic Church, why would Catholics even contemplate voting for these people? This anti-Christian, anti-Semitic party really needs a reality check.
PBS is still bloviating. They’re talking to “presidential historians” now. I’m out.
It’s 7:00, and PBS is actually joining coverage. I guess they had a late News Hour or something. No clue. Regardless, they joined Caroline Kennedy mid-speech. Could she be any more bland? Remember what I was saying about Democrat speakers being robots? Yeah, that’s happening again tonight. Hello, Jesse Jackson. She’s been droning on for the past five minutes, and I didn’t detect an ounce of enthusiasm.
Yikes. Poor former representative Gabby Giffords led the crowd in the Pledge of Allegiance earlier in the night. Good for her. Too bad she had to be escorted by the lamprey known as DWS. I’m just surprised that Democrats 1) know the pledge, and 2) include the “under God” part.
Now former secretary of state, Madeleine Albright, has joined the PBS commentators. Is it sad that this party is clinging to the past so badly? She looks like she just crawled out of a coffin. And isn’t it sad that she’s the go-to person in the Democrat Party for national security? Bored. I almost give credit to Judy [Woodruff] for asking Albright about the alleged lack of support for Israel. Naturally, Albright is spinning it, saying Obama is a staunch supporter of Israel. False.
Former governor of Michigan Jennifer Granholm – and current Current TV host – has the crowd surprisingly riled up. Pretty sure she was doing lines of coke before this speech. Holy cow.
Eva Longoria just took the stage to try and inject a little attractiveness into this convention. Too bad she’s a left wing hack and can’t really break out of her slutty character. What makes celebrities think that we should listen to them about political issues? Now she’s railing about paying her fair share. What’s with these Hollywood hacks that like to preach about paying more, but don’t? No one is stopping you, Eva, from paying what you believe is fair? And she’s done. She’s pretty attractive, but her politics make her lose points in that arena.
Now the governor of Montana, Brian Schweitzer, has taken the podium. Didn’t someone give this guy the dress code? Lazy. “He brought the wrong agenda to Massachusetts, and he’s the wrong guy to be President of the United States.” So moving Massachusetts from #50 in job creation to #26 is the wrong agenda. Oh, yes. For Democrats, that’s wrong. They’re renowned for wrecking economies. Uh oh. He’s bringing up gun licenses. Isn’t that taboo here? “That dog don’t hunt.” Couldn’t you find a better catch phrase for the lemmings to chant? I’m incredibly bored with this charlatan – trying to appeal to Midwesterners. Fail. He’s kind of reminding me of Cousin Eddie from the National Lampoon’s Vacation movies. I’m surprised he’s using such bold language about taking out Osama bin Laden. Too bad that that’s about the only legitimate accomplishment of Obama’s presidency – which you can’t really attribute to his leadership.
Now, former governor of Florida, Charlie Crist – turncoat and Marco Rubio’s floor mop. “I didn’t leave the Republican Party, it left me.” Really? “…Reagan would have been too moderate for today’s GOP.” Really?! Oh, let’s just talk common ground. Again, I’ll translate. “Common ground” to a Democrat means “taking ground from the GOP.” When I look at this guy, I see a weasel. Well, this is a first for the televised portion – the Gulf oil spill. Talk about a political maneuver. Obama tried to destroy the oil industry with that disaster. Like his ole buddy, Rahm Emanuel, said: you don’t let a crisis go to waste. Why doesn’t this guy just ask, “Can’t we all just get along and sing kum-bi-yah?”
And now, failed presidential candidate, gold-digger, and Senator of Massachusetts, Mr. Ketchup Queen, er, um, John Kerry. Oh, there it is. “An exceptional country does care about the rise of the oceans…” Knew he couldn’t get far into a speech without spewing Al Gore’s talking points. Now he’s on to anti-war talking points and blame games. Oh, yeah, because Mitt Romney wouldn’t have given the order to take out Osama bin Laden. “Ask Osama bin Laden if he’s better off than he was four years ago.” Backfire – yeah, President Obama screwed him too, but he’s a terrorist, not a citizen of the country Obama was elected to lead. Now he’s propping up the “success” in Libya. Right, because handing a country over to the Muslim Brotherhood is a “success.” I’m so bored with this notion that Romney isn’t qualified to lead because of his lack of foreign policy credentials. Really? Where were Obama’s foreign policy credentials four years ago? Now he’s saying that Mitt Romney is a flip-flopper. Well, you are the authority on flip-flopping, aren’t you, Senator? Oh my goat. Get this pompous windbag off the stage. He just made a Sarah Palin joke. That’s how obsessive this party is. It can’t let go.
Okay, I had to take a phone call, so I missed the end of Senator Ketchup’s, doh, Kerry’s speech, as well as the first part of the interview with Bob McConnell, Republican governor of Virginia. I’m surprised that PBS is giving time to the counter argument. He’s not saying anything that he didn’t say last week, so I’m going to take a break for sustenance.
For the love of goat. How many times can one convention play I Got a Feelin’ by the Black Eyed Peas?! Fail at both conventions. That song was a lead-in for Dr. Jill Biden. “…being a teacher isn’t what I do; it’s who I am.” And probably a NEA pawn too. There you go. Prop up his religion. He’s allegedly a Catholic. This party has some serious ground to attempt to reclaim with Catholics. Short and relatively sweet. I don’t buy it, but it wasn’t divisive per se.
Now an introductory video for Joe. This ought to be an evolution of hair plugging. This video is dragging on and on. Hopefully this means his speech will be shorter. Unlikely. You know what would have been better? A sizzle reel of his greatest speech moments, culminating with his “put ya’ll back in chains” moment.
And here he is. Let’s see if he can top Clinton for awfulness. Ew. Did he just called Jill “kitten”? Ugh. Normally, I’d think it was cute, but it’s usually gross with Democrats. Wow. Really? He just got his nights mixed up. Twice. He must be off script. It was Tuesday night, when Michelle spoke, Joe. This speech is a drag. He’s trying to be solemn, but it’s coming across as sedated. He sure doesn’t have the crowd riled up. I’m so bored with this speech that I just trolled the other networks to see if anyone was carrying it. Naturally, NBC is the only one. I want to laugh at the points he’s brining up about the president’s character and his drive, but it just sounds depressing. “[Romney] was willing to let Detroit go bankrupt.” They did go bankrupt, Joe. After we poured billions into them. He says Romney would have approached the auto industry “the Bain way.” I fail to see what’s wrong with that scenario. They went through a managed bankruptcy anyways – after the bailout. “Conviction, resolve, Barack Obama – that’s what saved the automobile industry.” Really? Wow. That’s so lame. I’m so distracted by Joe’s wattle. He looks like he should belong in the PBS box. Now we’re back to bin Laden. As if that’s the administration’s accomplishment. The SEALs and our intelligence agencies are the ones that got it done, they just did the obligatory thing and asked for the presidential go-ahead. “…the finest warriors in the history of the world.” – and only tepid applause. This is so sad. How much can you milk that one event for political gain? And now he’s got them on their feet. “Osama bin Laden is dead and General Motors is alive.” He’s really playing up this courage aspect. Pretty sure Hillary has more [cajones] than Barack. And now we’re on to DWS’s talking points, and the age-old “war on Medicare” that is prevalent at every single Democrat convention. There’s the mention of the Simpson-Bowles commission again. When will he mention that Obama rejected that plan as well? Apparently I missed the outsourcing talking points from DWS. She must have saved it for this convention instead of giving excerpts of it throughout her appearances on [P]MSNBC. Same thing with “DREAMers.” Oh, this ought to be good. He’s ripping Republicans on their term, “culture of dependency.” And he completely missed the point. Finish it up, Joe. I’m bored. “You deserve a president who will never quit on you.” And now I want to make a Brokeback Mountain reference, but the idea of doing so kind of grosses me out. Bored. “We see a future…where one isn't forced to live in the shadows of intolerance.” Was that a gay baiting or race baiting? Not really following you, Joe. And now he’s back to solemn, talking about taking care of our veterans. I’m glad he’s not trying to make this partisan, but I think he’s trying (and failing) to cry, not trying to keep himself from doing so. And he’s finally done. It wasn’t as pompous or self-congratulating as Clinton’s, but just as misguided and unsatisfying.
Now, who’s the warm up for President Kardashian? (Yes, that’s a Rush reference, but it’s so perfect.) Oh, so the warm-up act is Senator Dick Durbin from the always-politically pure state of Illinois. He’s just hitting talking points. I’m going to get more sustenance. I love how he brought up the DREAM act that he authored, but can’t celebrate the success of this president in getting it passed. Instead, he ursurped the checks and blances of our government and issued an executive order to enact it.
Now, a video about Obama and the past, narrated by George Clooney. How lame. This video is so awful. It’s downplaying Barack, and emphasizing Michelle, Joe, and Bill [Clinton]. I want to throw things at the television already. If that’s indicative of how this speech is going to go, pray for my television, it’s just the messenger.
And here’s Michelle to introduce him. A peck on the cheek? That’s it? She’s done more for your campaign than you’ve done in the last two. Probably didn’t poll well to go all Al Gore on her. Let’s see how abysmal this can get. He’s been speaking for a few minutes and it’s almost as if I can predict every single word that he’s going to say. It’s uncanny, really. And now we’re on to DWS’s talking points. Wow. I realize conventions cover the same ground over and over again, but this one just seems like it’s so much more repetitive than the Republican counter-arguments last week. Maybe it’s because there’s no ideas floating around this convention, but just defense and distractions. He’s ripping on Republicans wanting tax cuts and to roll back regulations. Why are those things bad? Boring. Where’s the plan for the next four years, Mr. President? There hasn’t been even a notion of what you’d do with a second term. You just keep saying, “we’re not done yet”, but what exactly are you not done with? Wrecking the economy, stamping out the constitution, and stacking the Supreme Court with activist judges? Okay, he just laid out a short “plan” that sounded oddly like what he said four years ago. Are we going vintage here? And there’s the outsourcing comment. He’s DWS’s [pawn]. “Three proud words – Made in America.” Obviously, you don’t come with that label. Yeah, I just went there. Oh my goat. I’ve heard this speech a thousand times before. Your writers need fired. I’d get mad at this broken record, but this is so expected that it’s sad. He’s propping up what he’d do with energy for our country, and morphing it into an environmental cause. “…in this election, you can do something about it.” I thought the last election was going to stop the rise of the seas and begin healing out planet. That didn’t happen? Oh, and back to energy. You’re so in love with the idea of jobs? How about green-lighting the Keystone Pipeline? Yeah, didn’t hear that option floated here. Now we’re on to education – you know, so we can hit all the notes that he’s hit in the same speech a thousand times before. Where is something new? Not that I really expect it, but the American people deserve better. “…leadership that is tested and proven.” Proven failure on nearly every level. Bored. Michelle doesn’t look very inspired. Now we’re on to foreign policy. “Our commitment to Israel’s security must not waiver.” Way to court the Jewish vote. You’ve got a lot of ground to make up. “My opponent and his running mate are new to foreign policy.” Guess what, Barack, I’d trust them any day with our foreign policies over you. “…without insulting our closest ally.” ARE YOU^%$#@! KIDDING ME?! The Winston Churchill bust, anyone?! Now we’re on to fiscal policy. So bored with his logic. Now he’s on to knocking Congress and alleging that Republicans just want to give tax breaks to their “millionaire friends.” Come on. I can’t even type any more, that’s how bored I am. I’m pretty much auto-tuning him out. It’s kind of a defensive mechanism. “We’re not entitled to success. We have to earn it.” I guess success is the only thing that you think we’re not entitled to. “We don’t think that the government is the source of all our problems.” Well, Mr. President, I agree with President Reagan. And last time I checked, he has an insurmountably better track record than you. “The election four years ago wasn’t about me.” Really? Tell that to Samuel L. Jackson, who only pulled the lever for you due to your race. I’m so bored here. He’s hitting all of the obligatory points to get the crowds on their feet. Must mean he’s almost done. And still, there’s no real plan in sight. Instead, he’s just playing to the demographics he needs to win – Hispanics, women, and gays. “I’m no longer just a candidate. I’m the president.” And thank God we have a system that allows us to get rid of you. At least, we have that system until (if/when) you get reelected, you decide you don’t like it and issue an executive order to get rid of it. Still bored. Wrap it up. It’s 10:00pm, and the last 40 minutes has been nothing but a broken record/compilation of sound bytes from the last four years. Now, the sob stories. For the love of goat, could politicians not use these? It’s political emotional whoring, and it’s ineffective. Okay, he’s wrapping it up I believe, so I’m going to already write this speech’s obituary.
This was a sad attempt to rile the base. Maybe it worked, but a lot of words don’t win over those with an ounce of intelligence (i.e. anyone that’s not in that room). Thirty-eight minutes of nothing but promising to fulfill promises he made four years ago. And now they’re playing Brooks & Dunn’s Only in America. Don’t ruin that song for me.
It’s finally over. I actually feel pretty good for the Republican Party coming out of this convention, because the Democrats had nothing to offer. Basically, it was a “reelect us and we’ll make more speeches and hate on Republicans more.” There was nothing of substance, and the whole atmosphere was so much less classy than what went on in Tampa. Plus, this was almost as if it were the “old” party. No youthful spirit, and a bunch of has-beens making speeches about accomplishments in former administrations. There’s no record for Obama to run on, and if people would just use their brains, they’d see that reelecting him would be disastrous for our country.
Mitt Romney can win this thing. It’s certainly possible. I’m optimistic about his chances. However, I’m also a realist, and see that this nation is teeming with idiots. This should be Romney’s race by 20 points now, and a landslide on election day, but unfortunately it’ll be close down to the finish. I still hold out hope. I won’t be one to just sit on the sidelines and watch my country go down the tubes. Is Romney perfect? No, certainly not. But after this convention, he’s clearly a better alternative to what this party in Charlotte has to offer. This week has been tough. If you stuck through it with me, I applaud you. I apologize if you found some of the content off-putting or offensive, but let me assure you – this was the censored/restrained version.
Thanks again, folks. Good night.
Romney/Ryan 2012.
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